Today I returned from Bolivia.
On Thanksgiving Day (of all days) I adopted a 17 year old Bolivian boy from Anguilla. We returned to the States via tugboat as Absalom's "papers" were destroyed in a plane crash near Trinidad. My assitant Marisol manned the sails, my wife Marilyn made a delicious pot roast and my new son, Absalom, and I fished for Barracuda.
I am honored to have this opportunity to shape a youth into a man. Develop the boy with my keen sense of discipline, wit, parental wisdom and sass. In various social and political circles circles I am known to be a well bred leader, well esteemed and virtuous - a veritable father figure. I am curious to see what kind of man he becomes and what he brings to his nitty-gritty Bolivian lifestyle.
The specific guidelines were underwritten as one full year of "adult-contemparary cosmopolitan year of guidance." I joked to his parents in Spanish, "Well, we won't be going to any Dionne Warwick concerts or anything." The room was silent, but I thought it was funny. Spanish has a different rhythm.
I have much to teach young Absalom.
Of course, you'll be able to see it. It will be airing on CBS this spring on the reality show tentatively titled "Beckett Boo's Bolivian Kid Swap Project". I'm still in disputes over the title, but what can I do? Les Moonves and I have been chums for years. I am being paid handsomely [as you can see ; )] but the great reward is the Gift of Fatherhood.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Amen.
Beckett Boo esq.
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